You might recognise this. You are capable, committed and experienced, yet in certain moments you do not feel confident. You hesitate. You wait for more information. You feel less ready than you would like. These moments can be frustrating, especially when you know you can do what is being asked of you.
This blog introduces a simple five day reflection I have created as a stand‑alone tool. It is a starting point for understanding yourself better and building feelings of confidence.
Separately, I am launching the first cohort of my Clarity and Confidence Programme in September, designed for emerging female leaders. If you find the reflection useful and fit the target group, you may be interested in joining a future cohort.
Before designing the programme, I reviewed ten years of coaching insights to understand what clients consistently bring to coaching:
- what they struggle with
- what they want to feel different
- what helps them make progress early on
One theme that stood out strongly was that my clients were capable but had similar patterns of behaviour – their feelings of confidence rose and fell depending on the situation, they were making limiting assumptions, they had times when perspective narrowed under pressure and they were hesitating to take action.
This is normal and we can get better at dealing with these patterns.
When these patterns show up, situations can feel more challenging than they need to be. Anxiety rises and we feel less confident. It is easy to get stuck in cycles of hesitation that do not reflect capability.
Understanding what shapes feelings of confidence helps people respond differently.
Feelings of confidence change with context, interpretation, perspective and the evidence we gather through small steps. This is the psychological backbone of the five day reflection.
I created the reflection because I wanted a way to help people be able to address the patterns in a simple, structured and practical way.
What the resource gives you
An opportunity in just 10 minutes or so a day to learn about and reflect on the following and potentially decide on some things you’d like to do (or think about ) differently:
- Day 1 – Confidence is contextual: Helps you see that feelings of confidence are shaped by the situation.
- Day 2 – Fact vs story: Helps you separate what actually happened from what you assumed or interpreted.
- Day 3 – Â Seeing the situation differently: Helps you widen your perspective and reduce pressure.
- Day 4 – Agency through micro bravery: Helps you take tiny actions that build evidence and feelings of confidence.
- Day 5 – Imagining yourself six weeks from now: Helps you connect small steps to a future that feels possible.
My own experience completing it
I recently worked through the reflection myself. I used a real example from my own work. I had a meeting coming up where I wanted to make my best impact and had not received the information I needed.
Day 1 helped me recognise that I felt underprepared and that some anxiety was beginning to show. I prefer certainty and clarity, and I did not have either.
Day 2 helped me separate fact from story. I noticed the assumptions I was making. This already helped me feel a little less anxious.
Day 3 helped me widen my perspective. I considered how someone else might see the situation. I recognised that my values were involved: quality, responsibility and fairness. That helped me understand why it felt uncomfortable.
Day 4 helped me choose one small action. That action helped me feel more resourceful and gave me a clearer sense of what I could do.
Day 5 helped me imagine myself six weeks from now. I could see that I would be better able to find a way forward when feeling anxious. I would have more evidence that I can make progress even when things are uncertain. I would still ask for information when I need it, but I would not be stuck if I did not get it.
Why this matters
Feelings of confidence grow in part through awareness, through noticing assumptions, through widening perspective and through small actions. This resource gives a starting point that feels manageable and supportive.
How to request it
You can request the reflection by signing up to my monthly blog and occasional emails here: https://www.freetolead.com/subscribe/
You can unsubscribe at any time.
Feelings of confidence become more accessible through small steps. This five day reflection is a good way to begin. It helps you understand yourself better and feel more confident in the moments that matter.
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