Ever felt like you are going to get found out at work? That you somehow aren’t up to the job you’ve got and surely it is only a matter of time until others think that too?
This has come up a few times with coaching clients lately where they have been quick to tell me that they have imposter syndrome and it can feel like a trap.
Imposter syndrome is actually more accurately named imposter phenomenon as it is not a clinical diagnosis but a feeling that can result in anxiety as well as limit our behaviours and choices, but also, at times, boost growth, and it is experienced by many people. Remembering that many people experience it can help to normalize it.
I’ve noticed with my recent clients that it is coming up for them when they’ve stepped into a bigger role – a role with greater scope, or more at stake, or different responsibilities.
So what can you do to better manage your feelings of being a fraud or imposter?
(1) Don’t label it. When people tell me that they have imposter syndrome, it almost becomes a part of them and their identity. The reality is that they don’t have these feelings all of the time. When they recognise that there are times when they feel capable and confident it is easier to be more accurate in describing the imposter issue such as ‘there are times when I feel as if I am not capable of doing an element of my job and that others will see this’.
(2) Change the narrative. Leading on from the above, it can make a note of successes and times when you feel capable, in the zone, confident etc. as a bit of a ‘treasure trove’ that you can dig into to remind yourself of what you are capable of. This helps to change the narrative in your head and, given that our thinking influences our behaviour, can also help us to make sure that feeling incapable doesn’t become a self-fulfilling prophesy. This is because feeling like a fraud can lead us to take less risks for fear of someone noticing which in turn means our comfort zone gets smaller and we can stagnate.
(3) You are not alone. On the subject of comfort zone, it can help to recognise that when we have been in a role for a while, we generally become more confident and capable as we learn the ins and outs of the role, build relationships and build credibility with our stakeholders, as well as build up a track record of achievements. When we step into a new role, we are stretching ourselves out of our comfort zone and those feelings of being inadequate or the self doubt that makes us feel we have been overpromoted are actually more common for people than we might realise. Just telling ourselves that this is normal and by putting in effort to get up to speed, build relationships, and get some small wins, can make a difference to how we feel and how we think.
(4) Re-frame. Reframe how you are viewing your work. Tell yourself that it is not a test with a pass or fail and where you have to perform but instead an experience as part of your life where you can learn, and grow and aim to add value. Taking this framing can enable you to get things done and to move through self-doubt more readily.
(5) Avoid the comparison trap. If you find yourself measuring yourself against others and coming up short, stop doing it. We measure ourselves against what we can see but often this is not the full picture. The only comparison that can be helpful is to ourselves … how do we feel we are doing compared to who we were a year ago for example? What would we like to be thinking about ourselves 6 months from now? What do we need to do in the next 6 months to make that more likely.
Finally, remember that acknowledging you don’t know everything can open you up to new learning opportunities – when feeling like an imposter, being specific about what it is that is leading to that feeling – needing more understanding of a new business, or building relationships with new customers, or learning how to influence better for example – can help you focus on actions to close any gaps leading to your personal growth.
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